Sunday, September 22, 2013
Satan's At It Again
Trying to remember children are a blessing but the lack there of is not a curse.
Sunday, September 8, 2013
A Glimpse at a Fertility Treatment Cycle
This is a glimpse at a IUI Fertility Treatment Cycle. It is hard to explain to someone what it is like to go through a cycle with words. Your life consists of treatment plans, doctors appointments, trying to guess when you might be doing the actual IUI and not being able to commit to anything because you have no clue when you will have to go to the doctor next. Usually I just say we take some shots and then do a treatment. The reality is that it's not that simple. You have to do the shots at the same time each night and within a thirty minute window; this means you have to prethink what you will be doing for potentially the next three weeks so you can plan to take your shot late enough that you will be home, but not too late that you are staying up until midnight. We try to shoot for a 9:30 p.m.-10:00 p.m injection time. Below is a diary of our latest cycle.
Wednesday, July 31, 2013: Cycle Day (CD 1)
I started my period this morning in the A.M. before work. I called first thing at 8:00 a.m. to report my cycle start. I made sure I kept my phone near with the ringer on so I wouldn't miss the callback from the nurse. The call came around 3:00 p.m. and we set up a CD 3 appointment.
Thursday, August 1, 2013: CD 2
Work dragged today and I was feeling anxious for my appointment tomorrow morning. It has been four months since our last treatment and I am worried I will have a cycst and we wouldn't be able to do the treatment this month. Sometimes the waiting is the worst part.
Friday, August 2, 2013: CD 3
I had to leave the house this morning at 7:45 a.m. to be at my appointment in Shreveport at 9:45 a.m. The wait was rather long today. I didn't get called back until 11:20 a.m. Once I was back we did the ultrasound and I was in and out in about fifteen minutes. I ate lunch at Johnny's pizza and was back in Nac about 2:15 p.m.. The pharmacy called later this afternoon and we order 14 vials of menopur and one HCG trigger shot. I already had five vials of menopur from last cycle so that saved a little money at $75 a vial. The trigger shot has increased by $20 since last ordered in April and is now $80. Thank God the menopur has stayed the same.
We had dinner at Shelly and Thad's tonight which was super fun, but it also meant I had to jump back into the shot saddle at a friends house. Around 9:30 we took a little break from playing scattegories and Stephen mixed up my double dose of menopur. I layed on their couch in the formal living room to take the shot which hurt like the dickens! I was hopeful the first one out wouldn't be so bad, but Stephen has a nack for finding the bad spots :(
Saturday, August 3, 2014: CD 4:
Callie, Lerin and I went to Shreveport tonight for a quick girls night: dinner at Superior's and Chaos 3 MMA fight. Lerin and I just finished Fire Academy and one of the firefighters was fighting his twin brother. We had to leave and go back to the hotel at about 10:00 p.m. so that Callie could give me my single dose shot of menopur. This was the first time I had ever mixed up the menopur myself, but giving a shot to myself was NOT going to happen. I am so grateful for friends who are willing to do the dirty work for me. Even Lerin had volunteered to give the shot if Callie didn't want to. Crazy thing, I didn't feel it AT ALL. I can honestly say Callie Berry is the best person I've ever received a shot from!
Sunday, August 4, 2013: CD 5:
Tonight around 9:30 p.m. I had a double dose of menopur. It hurt pretty badly but Stephen was quick.
Monday, August 5, 2013 CD 6:
As I was getting my shots of menopur ready tonight at 9:45 p.m. I realized the nurse had the dates wrong on my treatment plan sheet. She had me starting my double dose shot on CD 3, but had the date for CD 3 as August 3rd, which is really CD 4. Because of this I am possibly a day ahead on my shots! I called and left a message with answering service that I think I actually need an appointment tomorrow rather than Wednesday. I explained I live two hours away so they needed to get the message to the nurse ASAP in the morning.
Tuesday, August 6, 2013: CD 7
I got to work early this morning and called the clinic at 8:00 a.m.to talk about my cycle days. At 8:10 a.m. I left for Shreveport because the nurse says yes I need to come since I've had four days of shots already. She said I wasn't supposed to start my meds until Saturday. I was freaking out the entire ride there thinking that I may have messed everything up! I arrived at 9:50 a.m. and was out by 10:35 a.m. After looking at the chart, the nurse assured me I was correct to have started my meds on CD 3 and for calling to come in today. I felt better knowing I hadn't messed anything up! My right ovary has several cycsts: two larger ones measuring 11x7 and 10 along with several small ones measuring a six. The left ovary has multiple smalls, mostly sixes and sevens.
Today I shopped a little, got an hour massage, got a dozen krispy kreme donuts and was home by 4:50 p.m.
The nurse called back with my instructions and we did a double dose of menopur this evening around 10:00 p.m. It stung badly and when the needle was pulled out it hurt badly! Stephen was not on his A game tonight.
Wednesday, August 7, 2013: CD 8
I realized this morning that with my new injection cycle being double dose, triple does, double dose, triple does I would be out of shots before Monday if he keeps this nubmer of injections up. I called the clinic to see how many meds to order since we realized I will be out after Saturday with the upped dose. The nurse advised to get enough to get us through Monday and to guestimate that he will up my dose to a triple dose each day. I love how the nurses are like you know just order ten or twelve to be on the safe side. It's easy to say that in theory, it's another thing to say that when you are talking about $75 a dose!
I took a triple dose tonight. It wasn't too bad but stung like crazy afterwards at the injection sight. Stephen did a much better job pulling the needle out tonight. As I was laying there I was remembering the nurse the summer before 9th grade saying "this is the last shot you will ever have to get," as she gave me my hep b shot. Ha, how I'd love to speak to her now!
Thursday, August 8, 2013: CD 9
I almost forgot about my injection. I went to a shower for Tammi this evening and then over to the in-laws for dinner. We hung around and were watching tv until about 9:40 p.m. when I remembered them. One nice thing was that I did not dread the shot all evening!
I took a double dose of menopur that hurt really badly, but it was off and on throughout the shot. It's crazy how every time is different. Stephen decided to give me a sponge bath with alcohol rub in several different places on my stomach so I wouldn't know where the shot was going :) It is nice that he tries to make this awful event somewhat funny.
Friday, August 9, 2013: CD 10
I hung around house all day waiting for my precious meds to arrive. All they could tell me was they would be here between 8:00 a.m. and 6:00 p.m. I called Walgreens around 5:00 p.m. to check on them and make sure they were actually on the truck for delivery. They assured me the answer was yes. Well, they arrived at 7:00 p.m! Talk about a nervous patient.
I was anxious for them to get here because we then were finally able to head to Lufkin for Tammi's labor. Owen was ready to make his appearance today. We hung around until they started her potosin. We left for dinner at 9:15 p.m. knowing Owen woudl probably arrive by the time we were done and we could bring Chris and Tammi dinner. We ordered and were eating our appitizers when I realized I had forgotten about doing the shot and it was 9:55 p.m! Stephen drew it up in resturaunt at the table. I'm pretty sure we looke like druggies. Unofrotunatley I had forgotten the q cap which helps you draw up the meds. This meant that the needle had to go into three different vials before it went into me. AKA a super dull needle was going into my skin!
So here we were sitting at the booth in Olive Garden and I had to take my injection and now. We went to the back of the resturaunt and I laid down on a long bench. It was a triple dose and stung so badly. I couldn't make any noise because we already looked really weird. Stephen was so compassionate and offered hand which I in turn squeezed the dickens out of.
Saturday, August 10, 2013: CD 11
We left for Shreveport about 7:00 a.m. this morning. My appointment was at 8:45 p.m. and I was out of the office by 9:05 p.m. They move pretty fast when it's the weekend. I have three cycsts worth mentioning: a 19x11 and an 8 on the left along with an 11x 8 on the right.
The clinic called back this afternoon while we were out and about to say we needed to do the trigger shot tonight and the IUI on Monday. This is where you just want to kick yourself because you have $750 worth of meds sitting at your house right now. Part of you thinks man I just wasted that money and the other part of you thinks well I will just use them next time. Unfortunately I'm pretty sure there's gonna be a next time :(
We went to Chris Crenshaw's graduation party tonight and I realized it was ten. Stephen went home to get my trigger shot so I could stay and hang with Hannah. I ended up taking the shot on Chris' bed. This is the first time Stephen has done the trigger shot. I usually meet Dr. Vineyard up at the clinic to get it. The needle is about two inches and goes in my bottom. Stephen did a great job and it didn't hurt one bit going in, but the injection sight was awful and I have a huge bruise now!
Sunday, August 11, 2013: CD 12
We spent the night in Shreveport tonight to try and have some fun. We ate at the Cheesecake Bistro on the Boardwalk and are staying in a room at Diamond Jacks. While having a romanic evening together was fun, it was also kinda pointless to be in a romantic room with jacuzzi tub when things can't happen due to an IUI taking place the next day!
Monday, August 12, 2013: CD 13
It was nice to sleep in for an 8:30 a.m. appointment for once. Stephen wrote an encouraging note on my thighs that said "Get'er Done". I'd been waiting months to do this since the idea crossed my mind through a funny conversation Dr. Vineyard and I had back earlier in the summer. Dr. Vandermonlen is a pretty serious guy and I thought it would be funny. We got to the clinic and Stephen gave his sample. We ran to Krispy Kreme, then back to wait. We were out by 10:00 a.m. and home by noon. Dr. Vandermolen didn't do the IUI, the nurse did it, but she thought the note was funny. When she was done she said she had done her part, not it was up to the swimmers!
And so now begins the two week wait!
Monday, August 19th: CD 20
I showed up to physicians clinical to have my progestrone lab work done but they did not have orderes. I had to get Dr. Vineyard to order them. By that I mean I had to leave, go up to work, get an order, fill it out and then return to Physcians Clinc to have my blood drawn.
Dr. Vineyard called about an hour later to let me know my progesterone was 12. He said that was fine, but he also figured Dr. Vandermolen would still put me on progeIstrone. Needless to say about an hour after that I got the call that Dr. Vandermolen wanted it to be a 15 so I was to start the progestrone vaginal suppositiories that evening. I am to do them twice a day in the evening and the morning. I'll save the gorry details, but they are pretty gross and you have to lay down for about 45 mintues after you use one, which stinks in the morning before work!
Last week has gone by quicklk and I've felt hopeful the treatment has worked until this weekend. Now I don't think it's gonna work and I'm bidding my time.
Friday, August 23: CD 24
It's currently 12:29 am and I can't sleep. I'm anxious to do the HCG blood work tomorrow so I can just know.
I had my blood drawn around 9:00 a.m. She couldn't get a vein on right arm so after digging around for about a minute and thumping my arm to death she moved to left arm. It hurt like the dickens, but it will let me know three days sooner than a urine test.
I left Physician's Clnical and went to hobby lobby to kill time. After texting Tricia to see if the results had come over the fax I soon heard my phone ringing. It was about 10:30 a.m. The screen said Dr. Vineyard. I didn't even have to answer it. I already knew. He wouldn't have called me otherwise. He let me know my HCG is one.
Now the waiting game begins for my period. I go up to the Pharmacy so I can tell Stephen in person. I don't know how many more of these I can handle. Stephen says he understands.
Saturday, August 24: CD 25
I'm realizing this next treatment is probably gonna be our last treatment. I can't handle three more emotionally or physically. It's been a long four years and I'm exhausted. As I sat on the couch at my inlaws it was all I could do to keep from bawling my eyes out. Stephen was at the lease and I need him home and now.
Stephen and I talked and he has hit his emotional wall too. This next one is it. I feel bad because my parents graciously paid for this last cycle. I feel like they've wasted their money. I also feel like I'm going to be wasting another 3 grand with the next cycle, but I need to do one more going into it knowing this is the last one. Now if my period will just start already. Who knows when that will happen. Could be another ten days. Last months cycle was 35 days long!
Sunday, August 25. 2013: CD 1
I started my period about 8:10 a.m. this morning while getting ready for church. I see it as a blessing I didn't have to wait another ten days to start this last treatment cycle. I called to report the cycle start at 8:20 a.m.
I had it together when I left for church this morning, but in the middle of singing at the beginning of the service I lost it. Like ugly cry lost it. It took everything I had to keep it together until the shaking of the hands. All I could think was the TV camera could be on me and I'm about to lose it. I slipped out and into the balcony to sit with Clint and JoDee. Thankfully she had some Kleenex. I'm so gratefull for friends who will just sit and let you ugly cry next to them.
When I got home from church I had two missed calls from the nurse. The second call she went ahead and scheduled my appointment for Tuesday at 8:00 a.m.
Tuesday, August 27, 2013: CD 3
I overslept and woke up at 5:43 a.m. I was supposed to get up at 5:37a.m. Luckily the dogs started barking so it wasn't too bad. I arrived at 7:50 a.m. for my 8:00 a.m. appointment. I let the nurse know this was going to be our last cycle so to please relay the message to Dr. Vandermolen and that we want him to give it all he can with the injections. She asked me about IVF and I let her know we were not going to pursue. She let us know if this cycle does not work and we ever change our minds about more IUI's or IVF we just have to call and set up an appointment like normal with the onset of a cycle. And then as she looked at the screen of the ultrasound she said, "well, we won't be doing anything this cycle." I have three HUGE cycsts. Normally I'm always worried about this but for some reason this time it didn't even cross my mind this could happen. This is our last cycle and pregnant or not I am ready to be done with the season in our life. And so I left the appointment with a heavy heart having to wait yet another cycle to be able to start our last. That is if the cysts are gone by then.
There you have it, a never ending process at a glimpse. I'm exhausted having just written it and lived it all over again. Please pray as we wait to being the final cycle not just for a preganancy, but for our hearts if preganancy is not in His plans for us. We aren't quite sure what we will do next but prayers for guidance will be grately appriciated. Shortly put it's been a long road.
Wednesday, July 31, 2013: Cycle Day (CD 1)
I started my period this morning in the A.M. before work. I called first thing at 8:00 a.m. to report my cycle start. I made sure I kept my phone near with the ringer on so I wouldn't miss the callback from the nurse. The call came around 3:00 p.m. and we set up a CD 3 appointment.
Thursday, August 1, 2013: CD 2
Work dragged today and I was feeling anxious for my appointment tomorrow morning. It has been four months since our last treatment and I am worried I will have a cycst and we wouldn't be able to do the treatment this month. Sometimes the waiting is the worst part.
Friday, August 2, 2013: CD 3
I had to leave the house this morning at 7:45 a.m. to be at my appointment in Shreveport at 9:45 a.m. The wait was rather long today. I didn't get called back until 11:20 a.m. Once I was back we did the ultrasound and I was in and out in about fifteen minutes. I ate lunch at Johnny's pizza and was back in Nac about 2:15 p.m.. The pharmacy called later this afternoon and we order 14 vials of menopur and one HCG trigger shot. I already had five vials of menopur from last cycle so that saved a little money at $75 a vial. The trigger shot has increased by $20 since last ordered in April and is now $80. Thank God the menopur has stayed the same.
We had dinner at Shelly and Thad's tonight which was super fun, but it also meant I had to jump back into the shot saddle at a friends house. Around 9:30 we took a little break from playing scattegories and Stephen mixed up my double dose of menopur. I layed on their couch in the formal living room to take the shot which hurt like the dickens! I was hopeful the first one out wouldn't be so bad, but Stephen has a nack for finding the bad spots :(
Saturday, August 3, 2014: CD 4:
Callie, Lerin and I went to Shreveport tonight for a quick girls night: dinner at Superior's and Chaos 3 MMA fight. Lerin and I just finished Fire Academy and one of the firefighters was fighting his twin brother. We had to leave and go back to the hotel at about 10:00 p.m. so that Callie could give me my single dose shot of menopur. This was the first time I had ever mixed up the menopur myself, but giving a shot to myself was NOT going to happen. I am so grateful for friends who are willing to do the dirty work for me. Even Lerin had volunteered to give the shot if Callie didn't want to. Crazy thing, I didn't feel it AT ALL. I can honestly say Callie Berry is the best person I've ever received a shot from!
Sunday, August 4, 2013: CD 5:
Tonight around 9:30 p.m. I had a double dose of menopur. It hurt pretty badly but Stephen was quick.
Monday, August 5, 2013 CD 6:
As I was getting my shots of menopur ready tonight at 9:45 p.m. I realized the nurse had the dates wrong on my treatment plan sheet. She had me starting my double dose shot on CD 3, but had the date for CD 3 as August 3rd, which is really CD 4. Because of this I am possibly a day ahead on my shots! I called and left a message with answering service that I think I actually need an appointment tomorrow rather than Wednesday. I explained I live two hours away so they needed to get the message to the nurse ASAP in the morning.
Tuesday, August 6, 2013: CD 7
I got to work early this morning and called the clinic at 8:00 a.m.to talk about my cycle days. At 8:10 a.m. I left for Shreveport because the nurse says yes I need to come since I've had four days of shots already. She said I wasn't supposed to start my meds until Saturday. I was freaking out the entire ride there thinking that I may have messed everything up! I arrived at 9:50 a.m. and was out by 10:35 a.m. After looking at the chart, the nurse assured me I was correct to have started my meds on CD 3 and for calling to come in today. I felt better knowing I hadn't messed anything up! My right ovary has several cycsts: two larger ones measuring 11x7 and 10 along with several small ones measuring a six. The left ovary has multiple smalls, mostly sixes and sevens.
Today I shopped a little, got an hour massage, got a dozen krispy kreme donuts and was home by 4:50 p.m.
The nurse called back with my instructions and we did a double dose of menopur this evening around 10:00 p.m. It stung badly and when the needle was pulled out it hurt badly! Stephen was not on his A game tonight.
Wednesday, August 7, 2013: CD 8
I realized this morning that with my new injection cycle being double dose, triple does, double dose, triple does I would be out of shots before Monday if he keeps this nubmer of injections up. I called the clinic to see how many meds to order since we realized I will be out after Saturday with the upped dose. The nurse advised to get enough to get us through Monday and to guestimate that he will up my dose to a triple dose each day. I love how the nurses are like you know just order ten or twelve to be on the safe side. It's easy to say that in theory, it's another thing to say that when you are talking about $75 a dose!
I took a triple dose tonight. It wasn't too bad but stung like crazy afterwards at the injection sight. Stephen did a much better job pulling the needle out tonight. As I was laying there I was remembering the nurse the summer before 9th grade saying "this is the last shot you will ever have to get," as she gave me my hep b shot. Ha, how I'd love to speak to her now!
Thursday, August 8, 2013: CD 9
I almost forgot about my injection. I went to a shower for Tammi this evening and then over to the in-laws for dinner. We hung around and were watching tv until about 9:40 p.m. when I remembered them. One nice thing was that I did not dread the shot all evening!
I took a double dose of menopur that hurt really badly, but it was off and on throughout the shot. It's crazy how every time is different. Stephen decided to give me a sponge bath with alcohol rub in several different places on my stomach so I wouldn't know where the shot was going :) It is nice that he tries to make this awful event somewhat funny.
Friday, August 9, 2013: CD 10
I hung around house all day waiting for my precious meds to arrive. All they could tell me was they would be here between 8:00 a.m. and 6:00 p.m. I called Walgreens around 5:00 p.m. to check on them and make sure they were actually on the truck for delivery. They assured me the answer was yes. Well, they arrived at 7:00 p.m! Talk about a nervous patient.
I was anxious for them to get here because we then were finally able to head to Lufkin for Tammi's labor. Owen was ready to make his appearance today. We hung around until they started her potosin. We left for dinner at 9:15 p.m. knowing Owen woudl probably arrive by the time we were done and we could bring Chris and Tammi dinner. We ordered and were eating our appitizers when I realized I had forgotten about doing the shot and it was 9:55 p.m! Stephen drew it up in resturaunt at the table. I'm pretty sure we looke like druggies. Unofrotunatley I had forgotten the q cap which helps you draw up the meds. This meant that the needle had to go into three different vials before it went into me. AKA a super dull needle was going into my skin!
So here we were sitting at the booth in Olive Garden and I had to take my injection and now. We went to the back of the resturaunt and I laid down on a long bench. It was a triple dose and stung so badly. I couldn't make any noise because we already looked really weird. Stephen was so compassionate and offered hand which I in turn squeezed the dickens out of.
Saturday, August 10, 2013: CD 11
We left for Shreveport about 7:00 a.m. this morning. My appointment was at 8:45 p.m. and I was out of the office by 9:05 p.m. They move pretty fast when it's the weekend. I have three cycsts worth mentioning: a 19x11 and an 8 on the left along with an 11x 8 on the right.
The clinic called back this afternoon while we were out and about to say we needed to do the trigger shot tonight and the IUI on Monday. This is where you just want to kick yourself because you have $750 worth of meds sitting at your house right now. Part of you thinks man I just wasted that money and the other part of you thinks well I will just use them next time. Unfortunately I'm pretty sure there's gonna be a next time :(
We went to Chris Crenshaw's graduation party tonight and I realized it was ten. Stephen went home to get my trigger shot so I could stay and hang with Hannah. I ended up taking the shot on Chris' bed. This is the first time Stephen has done the trigger shot. I usually meet Dr. Vineyard up at the clinic to get it. The needle is about two inches and goes in my bottom. Stephen did a great job and it didn't hurt one bit going in, but the injection sight was awful and I have a huge bruise now!
Sunday, August 11, 2013: CD 12
We spent the night in Shreveport tonight to try and have some fun. We ate at the Cheesecake Bistro on the Boardwalk and are staying in a room at Diamond Jacks. While having a romanic evening together was fun, it was also kinda pointless to be in a romantic room with jacuzzi tub when things can't happen due to an IUI taking place the next day!
Monday, August 12, 2013: CD 13
It was nice to sleep in for an 8:30 a.m. appointment for once. Stephen wrote an encouraging note on my thighs that said "Get'er Done". I'd been waiting months to do this since the idea crossed my mind through a funny conversation Dr. Vineyard and I had back earlier in the summer. Dr. Vandermonlen is a pretty serious guy and I thought it would be funny. We got to the clinic and Stephen gave his sample. We ran to Krispy Kreme, then back to wait. We were out by 10:00 a.m. and home by noon. Dr. Vandermolen didn't do the IUI, the nurse did it, but she thought the note was funny. When she was done she said she had done her part, not it was up to the swimmers!
And so now begins the two week wait!
Monday, August 19th: CD 20
I showed up to physicians clinical to have my progestrone lab work done but they did not have orderes. I had to get Dr. Vineyard to order them. By that I mean I had to leave, go up to work, get an order, fill it out and then return to Physcians Clinc to have my blood drawn.
Dr. Vineyard called about an hour later to let me know my progesterone was 12. He said that was fine, but he also figured Dr. Vandermolen would still put me on progeIstrone. Needless to say about an hour after that I got the call that Dr. Vandermolen wanted it to be a 15 so I was to start the progestrone vaginal suppositiories that evening. I am to do them twice a day in the evening and the morning. I'll save the gorry details, but they are pretty gross and you have to lay down for about 45 mintues after you use one, which stinks in the morning before work!
Last week has gone by quicklk and I've felt hopeful the treatment has worked until this weekend. Now I don't think it's gonna work and I'm bidding my time.
Friday, August 23: CD 24
It's currently 12:29 am and I can't sleep. I'm anxious to do the HCG blood work tomorrow so I can just know.
I had my blood drawn around 9:00 a.m. She couldn't get a vein on right arm so after digging around for about a minute and thumping my arm to death she moved to left arm. It hurt like the dickens, but it will let me know three days sooner than a urine test.
I left Physician's Clnical and went to hobby lobby to kill time. After texting Tricia to see if the results had come over the fax I soon heard my phone ringing. It was about 10:30 a.m. The screen said Dr. Vineyard. I didn't even have to answer it. I already knew. He wouldn't have called me otherwise. He let me know my HCG is one.
Now the waiting game begins for my period. I go up to the Pharmacy so I can tell Stephen in person. I don't know how many more of these I can handle. Stephen says he understands.
Saturday, August 24: CD 25
I'm realizing this next treatment is probably gonna be our last treatment. I can't handle three more emotionally or physically. It's been a long four years and I'm exhausted. As I sat on the couch at my inlaws it was all I could do to keep from bawling my eyes out. Stephen was at the lease and I need him home and now.
Stephen and I talked and he has hit his emotional wall too. This next one is it. I feel bad because my parents graciously paid for this last cycle. I feel like they've wasted their money. I also feel like I'm going to be wasting another 3 grand with the next cycle, but I need to do one more going into it knowing this is the last one. Now if my period will just start already. Who knows when that will happen. Could be another ten days. Last months cycle was 35 days long!
Sunday, August 25. 2013: CD 1
I started my period about 8:10 a.m. this morning while getting ready for church. I see it as a blessing I didn't have to wait another ten days to start this last treatment cycle. I called to report the cycle start at 8:20 a.m.
I had it together when I left for church this morning, but in the middle of singing at the beginning of the service I lost it. Like ugly cry lost it. It took everything I had to keep it together until the shaking of the hands. All I could think was the TV camera could be on me and I'm about to lose it. I slipped out and into the balcony to sit with Clint and JoDee. Thankfully she had some Kleenex. I'm so gratefull for friends who will just sit and let you ugly cry next to them.
When I got home from church I had two missed calls from the nurse. The second call she went ahead and scheduled my appointment for Tuesday at 8:00 a.m.
Tuesday, August 27, 2013: CD 3
I overslept and woke up at 5:43 a.m. I was supposed to get up at 5:37a.m. Luckily the dogs started barking so it wasn't too bad. I arrived at 7:50 a.m. for my 8:00 a.m. appointment. I let the nurse know this was going to be our last cycle so to please relay the message to Dr. Vandermolen and that we want him to give it all he can with the injections. She asked me about IVF and I let her know we were not going to pursue. She let us know if this cycle does not work and we ever change our minds about more IUI's or IVF we just have to call and set up an appointment like normal with the onset of a cycle. And then as she looked at the screen of the ultrasound she said, "well, we won't be doing anything this cycle." I have three HUGE cycsts. Normally I'm always worried about this but for some reason this time it didn't even cross my mind this could happen. This is our last cycle and pregnant or not I am ready to be done with the season in our life. And so I left the appointment with a heavy heart having to wait yet another cycle to be able to start our last. That is if the cysts are gone by then.
There you have it, a never ending process at a glimpse. I'm exhausted having just written it and lived it all over again. Please pray as we wait to being the final cycle not just for a preganancy, but for our hearts if preganancy is not in His plans for us. We aren't quite sure what we will do next but prayers for guidance will be grately appriciated. Shortly put it's been a long road.
Saturday, September 7, 2013
Start Spreading the News: New York/New Jersey Tour 2013
So I've dropped the ball and it's already been a month since my fabulous trip to NYC! I have to credit the majority of these pictures to my fellow choir members. I did not take my camera on the trip, only my cell phone, thus almost all you see here are stolen from FaceBook. Oh social media, how I love you (sometimes!).
Becuase it has been over a month and it's a LONG post, please excuse my typo's and bad grammar!
If you've never had the privilege to go on a trip planned by Andre Simon, you are missing out. EVERYTHING is planned from the time you wake up, to what you should wear, to bathroom breaks and when you should breathe; just kidding, um... not really. To see the play by play and exactly how organized it is, check out the website (which could be saved as an app on the iPhone) Andre had created so we there was up to date information the entire trip!
Saturday:
Stephen braved the early morning and got me to the church at 5:30 am. We had prayer time and then headed out. On the bus ride to Houston Jody and I decided we wanted to see Wicked that night as it appeared we would have plenty of time for an evening show. I ordered our tickets on my phone and secured first row seats at a great price. We were pumped! We arrived in Newark around 4:00 pm and took the train to Penn Station where our hotel was located.
(I'd like to make a side note that when I got off the plane I had a gazillion missed text messages from JoDee Woodcock, Jenny Baker and Michael Kinney. Apparently we were going to be doing a Sprint Tri together the Sunday after I would be arriving home from my trip. Micheal was sponsoring us all, I just had to say yes and then everyone would be on board. A free Sprint Tri?, who needs a bike and water the week before a race?! Oh yes I'm in!)
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| Waiting for the Train to take us to Penn Station and the hotel. |
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| I love that Megan is actually concerned with getting our tickets in time. The rest of us...we must document with a pic! |
We were very lost and confused once we exited the train in Penn Station, NYC We roamed around train station looking for the actual subway system for quite some time. Once we found our bearings it was too late to head to Little Italy, our originally intended destination for dinner.
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| Our First NYC Tourist Photo Opp. |
Instead, we opted to get off the subway near the theatre district and eat in Times Square. Roxy's was on the menu for that night. They say things are always bigger in Texas. As evidenced by the picture below, THEY aren't always right.
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| And you know I have a BIG mouth!!!! |
After dinner the Miller's headed to Cinderella and Jody and I to Wicked; we planned to meet back up afterwards at the Subway Station. As we arrived at the ticket counter I was worried our tickets wouldn't actually be at will call. I had ordered them on my iPhone and the screen was little. My worst fears started coming true, the lady stated she did not have tickets under the name Wyatt. I got out my phone and gave her my confirmation number from the ticket master email. She then informed me our tickets were for that day's matinee. WHAT?! It wasn't Sunday, they don't have matinees on Saturdays! And so, I fork out the credit card and got two more tickets. We were there to see Wicked and so Wicked we were going to see! These seats actually ended up being much better, about twelve rows back and in the center which saved us from having neck cramps. What an experience!
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| The Set is AMAZING! |
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| Why no, we did not just take a picture ma'am. |
We met up with the Miller's afterwards, navigated our way home, and hit the sack (after a late night two miles on a treadmill, did I mention I was doing a Sprint Tri in less than eight days?). It was an exciting and early day we had planned for Sunday, our first official leg of the tour.
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| Headed Back to the Hotel |
Sunday:
Sunday morning there was a breakfast for just our group at the hotel. Of course I slept as late as possible and arrived downstairs in just enough time to eat and get to the lobby where the bus was to pick us up.
This is where Satan began to mess with us. LONG story short our bus arrived over an hour late and it was not a regular bus. It was a party bus; You know the type you rent for a bachelor party, which I'm pretty sure it was used for the night before as evidenced by the urine and vomit smell that engulfed you as you stepped onto the bus.
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| Practicing in the Lobby of the Hotel Waiting for the Bus to Arrive |
And so we arrived at Somerset Hills Baptist church in Basking Ridge, NJ AFTER the service normally begins. They were gracious and waited for us to setup our bells and then they proceeded as planned. Their service went as usually but we filled the preaching section with our concert. It was so neat to see people truly worshiping as they listened and sang along with us. Satan tried to stop us from arriving, but God saw to it that his message for Somerset Hills would not be stopped.
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| The landscape was gorgeous! |
After the service we were fed a great meal of lasagna, salad, garlic bread and sweet tea along with a Texas Sheet Cake for dessert.
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| Good food, Great Company! |
We loaded up and headed to Calvary Baptist Church in Aberdeen, NJ with a detour at the Bridgewater Commons Mall to kill some time. Yes a few clothes were bought ;)
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| The church reminded me on the inside of the church I grew up going to in Ruston, LA, Temple Baptist Church, before it moved to its current location. |
We arrived in Aberdeen around 4:30 and the hand bells had their opportunity to actually practice; they had played cold turkey at the concert earlier that morning. We all sat around and some even took naps to pass the time. As time drew closer to the concert I noticed lots of amazing smells coming from the fellowship hall. Could it be, where we going to be fed church lady food?! Yeah!
The concert was amazing and again, it was awesome to see the congregation worship with us. It's always fun to see people sing along to songs they know. We had so many songs prepared Andre was having to make cuts during the program according to time and our voices.
After the concert was over we headed to a good ole fashion pot luck dinner! It must be a baptist thing rather than just a southern thing because these ladies could cook. There was SO much food it was hard to know where to start.
While the day was taxing with the bus issues and the lack of practice before our first concert, God was glorified and worshiped. The food and fellowship was sweet and knowing God used us to bless these two smaller congregations was well worth it.
You know the saying, "What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas." Well, most of what happens on the party bus stays on the party bus! Here's our rendition of Urine the Party Bus, featuring Allen Reed.
Monday we had breakfast in the hotel again, but this morning we had to have all of our luggage ready because we were going to be moving to our NYC hotel that evening. We ate, loaded up and headed to Project Hospitality on Staten Island. We traded the party bus for more of a people mover type bus. Our driver Mike was AMAZING and extremely informative about what all we were seeing and driving past. Once we arrive at Project Hospitality we were given a tour of the facility and an explanation of their history and services they provide. Upstairs they had a "super market" where people could "shop" for food and downstairs is where hot meals were provided. One of the things I like about their philosophy was treating people with kindness. If there are enough volunteers they bring the food to the patrons and serve them restaurant style. There were table clothes and even flowers on each table. Dignity is the word that comes to mind. During the meal time we sang while some of our group served.
This singing experience was quite different than the night before. In some respects it felt like we were singing and our words were hitting a wall. No one sang along and many seemed disinterested. In many ways it was heartbreaking. After we sang we went around to the different tables to introduce ourselves and try to get to know some of the people. I personally met several people but found it hard to connect and get a conversation going beyond surface level. While it was somewhat disappointing I do know that God used us to provide a meal and sing his word; it may have fallen on deaf ears, but then again it may not have. There was one lady who was helping serve that I know we blessed with our songs. She even requested we sing one twice. The project hospitality portion of our trip while not "life changing" was a great experience and I'm so glad we were there!
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| Part of our Group Singing at Project Hospitality |
That afternoon we headed into the city to the Hilton Garden Inn just off Times Square and in the heart of the theatre district. This was one of our free evenings and we ate at Scarlatto. It had a mix of Italian and American foods and was VERY tasty!
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| LaDonna and I had a great time at our end of the table! |
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| Great group with whom to share the evening. |
After dinner our group headed over to watch The Newsies. In comparison to Wicked the set was very basic, however it was lots of scaffolding that rotated and that was pretty cool. As for the musical itself, the dancing was phenomenal. The athleticism of the actors was unbelievable. I had seen the movie version and the live thing did not leave me wanting!
Tuesday:
Tuesday morning our schedule had some options: Get up and leave for Good Morning America at 6:15 or sleep in. My original plan was to sleep in a bit and get up to run with Glen, but my allergies were messed up and my throat and sinus cavity felt like they were about explode. Dr. Vineyard called in a zpack to my hubby (really he just gave me the okay so I called it in) and then first thing Tuesday morning I went across the street to CVS to get it filled. I picked up Claritain D for the time being. They were going to have to wait until ten to get the transfer from M and S. Needless to say after a night of very little sleep I was awake, but not feeling too hot.
We gathered together around 9:00 and headed to Harlem to deliver meals to seniors with the City Meals on Heels program. There is so much I could say about this adventure. We were all put into groups and each group was given a map with directions of who to deliver to. After specific instructions on how to deliver and the do's and don'ts we were off. Our group walked a total of five miles delivering meals through out the burrow. Most of the places we delivered to were project housing that reminded me a lot of old college dorms was far as how small the hall ways were. No of the people we delivered to asked us to come in and we were specifically told not talk about religion with them. So I found myself in the midst of the heat and aching feet and splitting headache prayer walking as I could. A few girls from our group did have an unfortunate run in with a man in an elevator wanting to stir things up by asking questions about the Trevon Martin Case. This was scary and we left the complex as quickly as possible. What was supposed to take about an hour ended up taking several and unfortunately caused us to miss singing at the Norwegian Christan Home in Brooklyn. It a long afternoon and a lot was experienced. It was an exhausting tyring experience, but one that truly helped me realize how blessed I am.
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| Our Meals on Heels Delivery Group |
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| It doesn't look like anything special, but it is! |
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| My End of the Table had some Great Ladies:) |
Jerry no longer lives in NYC, but in Upstate New York. He was visiting his brother and best friend, both of whom came with him to our hotel lobby that evening. When Andre originally contacted Jerry to see if he could come share with our group, he did not know Jerry no longer lived in NYC. Jerry got back with Andre and let him know he would be visiting family and would love to meet up with us. Come to find out through his best friend, Jerry specifically made the trip to visit his brother so that he could come talk with us. It was about a five hour trip for him. We went to NYC to bless others and Jerry was just one of the many blessings we received in return.
God makes NO MISTAKES!
Wednesday:
Wednesday was our West Point day. We did not have to be anywhere until 11:45 so Glen and I got up and ran to Central Park (but I was a loser and still didn't feel well so we only did two miles). I had breakfast in the hotel restaurant and then out we headed.
Mike who had been our bus driver on Monday picked us up again and took us on our way. Once we arrived at West Point we were joined on the bus by a tour guide and took the driving tour through campus. It was super interesting and I loved all the history.
After the tour we had a bit of time to eat dinner. There were a few restaurants just off campus so we parked and walked to our dinner. Jody, LaDonna, April and I opted to eat at an awesome Pizza place. I can't remember the name of the place, but it was amazing! After dinner we were to meet back at the bus so we could head over to the Post Chapel.
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| We were the ONLY ones on the bus and it was PAST time for us to randevou Even Andre, Mr. "To be early is to be on time; to be on time is to be late" wasn't there! |
We headed over to the Post Chapel around five to prepare for our concert at seven. So here's the thing, school was not in session and thus the only people on campus were the Plebes for the incoming class. I had envisioned us going to West Point to sing and there being a packed house. Needles to say this was not the case. There were a grand total of ten people in our audience. Ten. I'm not gonna lie, at first I was upset, but then God reminded me that we were there for THOSE ten people. There was the music minister who had helped get the concert arranged, the chaplain and his fiance, a family with three kids and a couple who was the in-laws of the daughter of one of our choir members. Two things stick out to me about the concert. The first is that Tony our bus driver was amazed by the hand bells, which he had never seen or heard before, and complementary of our singing. I pray that he really HEARD the gospel that night and a seed was planted. I was glad he took us up on our invite to come in and listen; the driver from Sunday had not and so I wasn't too hopeful Tony would. Second is that sometimes God brings a choir from Nacogdoches, TX to minister to extended family members of that choir. Without really sharing details, I believe without a doubt God had us at West Point to minister to the in laws of our choir members daughter. God is good and his message is healing. While what I envisioned for West Point was not what God envisioned. And for that I am grateful!
After the concert was over we headed back to the city. The ride seemed to take FOREVER (speak with the Sandlot Voice!). We were all a bit hungry due to our early dinner and a conviencent store stop was made. Jody and I had asked that morning if anyone wanted to go to the Empire State building when we got back that evening. We didn't realize we would be getting back at 11:00 pm. Needless to say our enthusiastic group of several dwindles to a perfect group of five: Jody, Lanette, Mike and Marilyn. I have to say going to the Empire State building at midnight was the BEST! We knew we only had one day to really sight see and we couldn't do it all, YOLO. The line was short (non existent), the view was phenomenal and the company perfect. One thing I did not expect was the wind. It was blowing so hard and we were so high that the butterflies in my stomach were AWESOME! Almost as good as when you ride a roller coaster.
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| Come again ma'am, you're a church secretary? LOL, we just couldn't resist all the poles! |
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| The amount of "lines" we had to walk through from this point was crazy. I'm pretty sure people have to wait five hours during the day. It took a good fifteen minutes just to walk through all the areas! |
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| The wind almost blew us away! |
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| The picture doesn't doesn't do it justice :( |
And so, after a long day and an amazing midnight trip, we went to sleep and gear up for our one day of sight seeing before heading home.
Thursday:
This was a pack it all in because this is all you have left day. I purposely photographed the entire day...
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| A good breakfast is a must for a day full of site seeing! |
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| Waiting on the Subway: Do you know what's Uptown near the 49th Street and 7th Avenue Station? |
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| Tiffany's, that's what! I waited SIX whole days to get to you1 |
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| And so did these amazing ladies! What's in my little blue bag you ask, Collar Stays (sp?) and Cuff Links for Estie, a tiny bow necklace along with a pearl drop necklace. No Jody, I am NOT a princess, but yes I might be a little spoiled! |
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| You've never to big to visit the toy store... |
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| And play on the BIG piano. |
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| Where is this child's mama? Doesn't she see we are trying to take a picture! |
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| Lunch at the Plaza? |
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| Central Park Carriage Ride |
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| "So no one told you life was gonna be this way..." |
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| "..It's like you're always stuck in second gear...I'll be there for you...'cause you're there for me too." |
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| We had a hard time getting our driver to actually be in a picture. Illegal much? |
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| Yeah for cost sharing! |
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| When in doubt, check YELP! We almost couldn't find this awesome place that only sat about fifteen people. |
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| Classic Photo Bomb by the waiter. |
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| Now that's better :) |
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| Thank you Sharon for actually taking pictures! |
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| Minus Wendy Williams as Mama (oh she was AWFUL!) the dancing was amazing and the songs were so fun. I kept having to remind myself to stop singing out loud. |
And there you have it. Hard to know where to start and what to do when you only have one day. Central Park and the Plaza were new to me so I'd say it was a successful day!
Friday:
While I had a fantastic week and God did some amazing things, I was ready to get home. Only problem, Stephen was in Frisco for the annual Texas Pharmacy Association Conference. Talk about a sad day coming home to an empty house (thank you Don and Jane for picking me up!). But alas, my tempur pedic was a feel for a soar back. A quick swim and run to Academy and then to bed. Saturday came sooner than I expected and I was headed to Denton to Tri my heart out after a week of no workouts except for three miles on the treadmill (a two miler and a on miler on separate days) and a two miler to/in Central Park. Check out my next post to see how that turned out ;)
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