Let's Do This Thing!

So...I guess I'm going to jump on the blog band wagon.  Stephen and I have had lots going on in our lives over these past two years and we are finally at a place now where we are wanting to share what God is doing/teaching us in our lives.  I want this blog to be a place that we can share a joys and struggles along with our every day life. We've just moved back to our home town.  Here's how it all happened...

 You know that plan everyone has when they get married about how the next ten years of your life will work out?  Well Stephen and I are no different and we had that plan.  I would graduate from college after the first two years of our marriage and then get a teaching job.  I would work for about three or four years and then we would have kids.  The first two steps went without a hitch.  I was able to finish up my degree (with one crazy summer of taking 18 hours) in two years and got an amazing job of Lufkin ISD.  I taught tenth grade World History and worked with some of the most amazing people. 

That plan we had, well it began to change about four months into my first year of teaching.  Our nephew Jackson was born that September and his arrival really got me to thinking more closely about our plan especially regarding children.  A couple of friends I knew where having a hard time getting pregnant and I began to realize how old my in-laws are.  God had not blessed Stephen's parents with children until many years into their marriage, thus making them older parents.  Because of this none of Stephen's grandparents are alive today (How I wish I could have met them all!).  I want Don and Jane to know my children and for my children to know their grandparents.  So after contemplating this for about a month I felt like it was time to brace the subject with Stephen.  Opening weekend of deer season sitting in a deer stand Stephen and I talked and made a decision that would change the course of our plan and change the rest of our lives.  We laughed, we cried and at that moment we decided to start trying. 

Of course I would be pregnant in no more than two, three months at the max and that was that.  Sometimes when I think back to those first months of trying I wonder if God was laughing at us.  We had a plan and then we changed the plan and we/I just knew how everything was going to play out. 

Fast forward to the Spring of 2011.  After over a dozen negative tests, lots of local doctors appointments, some fertility meds and a surgery we still weren't pregnant.  While I loved my job and loved being around high schoolers (whom I am passionate about) I realized I just needed a break.  Our district was offering $1000 early resignation incentives and Stephen and I decided to trust that God would provide and I turned in my resignation.  Again in my plan I just knew that after all we had been through that I would for sure get pregnant sometime in the next few months and wanted to stay home once I had the baby.  I did not want to quit in the middle of a school year so really this just made sense.  During this time I was given the opportunity to take a job with the Journey Magazine starting that summer when school was finished.  I was excited for a change of pace and to have a job that would be more flexible and potentially more profitable. 

While things did not quite go the way I expect with that job, I do believe that God used it to bring Stephen and I back to Nacogdoches.  During that last month I was soliciting M&S to do an advertisement, and while they didn't buy and ad, ultimately that interaction lead to Stephen's new job! (That is another amazing long story in itself!) 

After I stopped working for The Journey I started subbing for LISD.  This has turned out to be the  perfect job for me.  I began seeing a fertility specialist in Shreveport back in November and with the subbing gig I was able to work the days I needed to work and take off the days I needed to be at the doctor.

So here we are in February.  We started fertility treatments with the specialist in December, Stephen started his new job with M&S at the beginning of January and we bought a new house and moved to Nac in the middle of January.  So as for that plan we had when we got married, it's gone out the window!  While the plan God had for us has not in any way been a cake walk all the time, it has been HIS plan and for that I am so grateful. 

I have my good days and my bad days as far as the infertility is concerned.  But through it all one thing that has always remained is Gods total, perfect and no strings attached love for me.  It's been a journey, and one that I am now ready to share openly, of ups and downs.  I've been through the grief cycle and for the most part am now to the point of acceptance.  God has a plan for us and it is PERFECT.  In that I find my peace.

So here we are back in our home town five years later.  While my life does not look anything like I thought it would five years ago with my original plan or even two years ago with my updated plan, I know I am blessed beyond measure!