Mother's Day

Mother's Day....I was pretty good this morning.  I opted to sit with my MIL and FIL rather than sing in the choir.  I only cried a bit during the service.  Thankfully the pastor's sermon was not focused on Mother's Day.

My sweet friend Tammi gave me a necklace and card for Mother's Day.  It's nice to have something specific to remind me of the baby.  I had been wanting to get some type of jewelry, even hoping Stephen could read my mind and know I wanted something, but he didn't and I hadn't gotten anything.  It was so thoughtful of her to think of me and I will treasure the necklace forever.

There have been several pregnancy announcements in my life over the past several days.  Some close friends others not.  My feelings are different on a case by case basis.  I seem to do better at not being bitter and having genuine excitement for those who are close to me.  For some reason it's the ones who aren't that are the target of my anger at the moment.

This too shall pass I know, but I wish I didn't feel this way.  I wish I had the perfect Christian reaction.

Tammi, my mom, and my sister are the only ones that told me happy mother's day.  I know to the world I am not a mom and I do and don't consider myself a mom.  It's a weird thing.  I had hoped Stephen would know I wanted him to tell my happy mother's day and I would have liked something like a card, but he's a guy and they process differently and I can't be mad because I did not tell him.

These are just a few of the things going through my head right now...